At one point i met a successful business owner with a lighting and fixture store, who took kindly to me and a solid work ethic i had and provided me a constant series of jobs and projects that kept me busy and physically exerted. It was both hard at times and re-invigorating.

I have often felt Tucson is a locale i have lived before in and even by the standards of those accustomed to the searing heat of summers i was acting unusual in my work outdoors.

As a matter of fact i remember some of my contemporary workers in the landscape business would drive by the intersection of this man's business where i was working and laugh at me

Here, back in Tucson and this time present for the funeral of my beloved Uncle Mike, gave me much perspective on the long term nature of assimilating the mystical energies that forever have changed my life.

I decided to re-visit Tucson in some of the earlier fashion i would discover this city and the self-exploring nature the desert afforded in my consciousness.

Tucson has a public Transit system called Sun Tran (a bus system) that i often used to take when i lived here. Much was different then, especially in my outlook to life. Though i was eager to find my purpose, especially a more defined sense of the spiritual direction of my soul, i was cautious too.

Funny, how we can entertain two levels of thought, almost in a dual nature. One was i seem to be drawn to an introspective awareness of my role in life, or the as yet, undefined role i might play.

I carried around an almost brooding sense of feeling that i might be abandoned to solitude in the desert and yet i also found a comforting resiliency returning to me as i would often take long walks in the drying washes abundant in Tucson.

Early on back then, i had not known, consciously i would come to meet the path and awareness of community and service i was to discover regarding Saint Germain and the causes of the Ascended Masters, but clearly looking back on it, i was already immersed in the course of preparation and personal initiation.

Now, i had become a markedly different man, made by experiences and setting forth in life to both discover and prove the path of an Ascended Master influence in the practical world of form.

While dedicating myself as a student, I always hoped to be an asset to the fabulous tapestry of a Spiritual Presence and realm of guidance to mankind as taught through Saint Germain teachings.

Yet here in Tucson i would be able to re-evaluate my "progress" or the energy i would need to increase to expand my work and to personally re-energize my mission.

We all reach places where through circumstances or as the Masters might describe it, by toiling through our Karmic responsibilities to life, we can experience a sense of being bogged down by the densities of the planet or through our own repetitive cycling or undisciplined energies.

So Tucson again became a welcomed shift from a city like San Francisco, which I live in and I dialed down my excess energies through walking before I boarded the Sun Tran.

I almost automatically re-called how i used to board these buses with landscape tools when i had no truck as a way to get to jobs i created for myself. Even by some of the bizarre people and things you see on the Tucson bus system, a man getting on board with a pick ax is somewhat unusual, which is what i had to do, take my tools with me.

I had pretty good sales skills from my background in professional sales, though in those times i was not able to mentally apply myself, having undergone a deep transformational change in my psyche.

Landscaping was a way i could physically approach life and regain and express latent strengths that were serving me as i pounded away and cleared rocks, debris and weeds not only literally but as an exercise in resurrecting and healing my being.

At one point i met a successful business owner with a lighting and fixture store, who took kindly to me and a solid work ethic i had and provided me a constant series of jobs and projects that kept me busy and physically exerted. It was both hard at times and re-invigorating.

I have often felt Tucson is a locale i have lived before in and even by the standards of those accustomed to the searing heat of summers i was acting unusual in my work outdoors.

As a matter of fact i remember some of my contemporary workers in the landscape business would drive by the intersection of this man's business where i was working and laugh at me,

Funny, how we can entertain two levels of thought, almost in a dual nature. One was i seem to be drawn to an introspective awareness of my role in life, or the as yet, undefined role i might play.

I carried around an almost brooding sense of feeling that i might be abandoned to solitude in the desert and yet i also found a comforting resiliency returning to me as i would often take long walks in the drying washes abundant in Tucson.

Early on back then, i had not known, consciously i would come to meet the path and awareness of community and service i was to discover regarding Saint Germain and the causes of the Ascended Masters, but clearly looking back on it, i was already immersed in the course of preparation and personal initiation.

Now, i had become a markedly different man, made by experiences and setting forth in life to both discover and prove the path of an Ascended Master influence in the practical world of form.

While dedicating myself as a student, I always hoped to be an asset to the fabulous tapestry of a Spiritual Presence and realm of guidance to mankind as taught through Saint Germain teachings.

Yet here in Tucson i would be able to re-evaluate my "progress" or the energy i would need to increase to expand my work and to personally re-energize my mission.

We all reach places where through circumstances or as the Masters might describe it, by toiling through our Karmic responsibilities to life, we can experience a sense of being bogged down by the densities of the planet or through our own repetitive cycling or undisciplined energies.

So Tucson again became a welcomed shift from a city like San Francisco, which I live in and I dialed down my excess energies through walking before I boarded the Sun Tran.

I almost automatically re-called how i used to board these buses with landscape tools when i had no truck as a way to get to jobs i created for myself. Even by some of the bizarre people and things you see on the Tucson bus system, a man getting on board with a pick ax is somewhat unusual, which is what i had to do, take my tools with me.

I had pretty good sales skills from my background in professional sales, though in those times i was not able to mentally apply myself, having undergone a deep transformational change in my psyche.

Landscaping was a way i could physically approach life and regain and express latent strengths that were serving me as i pounded away and cleared rocks, debris and weeds not only literally but as an exercise in resurrecting and healing my being.

At one point i met a successful business owner with a lighting and fixture store, who took kindly to me and a solid work ethic i had and provided me a constant series of jobs and projects that kept me busy and physically exerted. It was both hard at times and re-invigorating.

I have often felt Tucson is a locale i have lived before in and even by the standards of those accustomed to the searing heat of summers i was acting unusual in my work outdoors.

As a matter of fact i remember some of my contemporary workers in the landscape business would drive by the intersection of this man's business where i was working and laugh at me

While dedicating myself as a student, I always hoped to be an asset to the fabulous tapestry of a Spiritual Presence and realm of guidance to mankind as taught through Saint Germain teachings.

Yet here in Tucson i would be able to re-evaluate my "progress" or the energy i would need to increase to expand my work and to personally re-energize my mission.

We all reach places where through circumstances or as the Masters might describe it, by toiling through our Karmic responsibilities to life, we can experience a sense of being bogged down by the densities of the planet or through our own repetitive cycling or undisciplined energies.

So Tucson again became a welcomed shift from a city like San Francisco, which I live in and I dialed down my excess energies through walking before I boarded the Sun Tran.

I almost automatically re-called how i used to board these buses with landscape tools when i had no truck as a way to get to jobs i created for myself. Even by some of the bizarre people and things you see on the Tucson bus system, a man getting on board with a pick ax is somewhat unusual, which is what i had to do, take my tools with me.

I had pretty good sales skills from my background in professional sales, though in those times i was not able to mentally apply myself, having undergone a deep transformational change in my psyche.

Landscaping was a way i could physically approach life and regain and express latent strengths that were serving me as i pounded away and cleared rocks, debris and weeds not only literally but as an exercise in resurrecting and healing my being.

At one point i met a successful business owner with a lighting and fixture store, who took kindly to me and a solid work ethic i had and provided me a constant series of jobs and projects that kept me busy and physically exerted. It was both hard at times and re-invigorating.

I have often felt Tucson is a locale i have lived before in and even by the standards of those accustomed to the searing heat of summers i was acting unusual in my work outdoors.

As a matter of fact i remember some of my contemporary workers in the landscape business would drive by the intersection of this man's business where i was working and laugh at me

So Tucson again became a welcomed shift from a city like San Francisco, which I live in and I dialed down my excess energies through walking before I boarded the Sun Tran.

I almost automatically re-called how i used to board these buses with landscape tools when i had no truck as a way to get to jobs i created for myself. Even by some of the bizarre people and things you see on the Tucson bus system, a man getting on board with a pick ax is somewhat unusual, which is what i had to do, take my tools with me.

I had pretty good sales skills from my background in professional sales, though in those times i was not able to mentally apply myself, having undergone a deep transformational change in my psyche.

Landscaping was a way i could physically approach life and regain and express latent strengths that were serving me as i pounded away and cleared rocks, debris and weeds not only literally but as an exercise in resurrecting and healing my being.

At one point i met a successful business owner with a lighting and fixture store, who took kindly to me and a solid work ethic i had and provided me a constant series of jobs and projects that kept me busy and physically exerted. It was both hard at times and re-invigorating.

I have often felt Tucson is a locale i have lived before in and even by the standards of those accustomed to the searing heat of summers i was acting unusual in my work outdoors.

As a matter of fact i remember some of my contemporary workers in the landscape business would drive by the intersection of this man's business where i was working and laugh at me

At one point i met a successful business owner with a lighting and fixture store, who took kindly to me and a solid work ethic i had and provided me a constant series of jobs and projects that kept me busy and physically exerted. It was both hard at times and re-invigorating.

I have often felt Tucson is a locale i have lived before in and even by the standards of those accustomed to the searing heat of summers i was acting unusual in my work outdoors.

As a matter of fact i remember some of my contemporary workers in the landscape business would drive by the intersection of this man's business where i was working and laugh at me, sometimes say this expressively in Spanish i did not understand in words, but i got the jest of what they where saying through their mannerisms.

I like to work strenuously without a shirt or hat in the full sun, which in itself is not that wise. Maybe that is where i got the tag, "Los Lobos loco" or the crazy wolf. My zeal did not always work for me, one time i had a dis-orienting sun stroke as i was digging a hole for a large shrub, more like a tree and found myself pretty deep in the hole as the high sun reflected off a newly constructed house's painted finish and was literally baking me.

But on another level i was immersing myself in the searing energies to accelerate burning off the dross in my consciousness and the desert was more than willing to help. It too seemed to at times be laughing at me and some of my silliness, but the desired purpose was being accomplished.

During one of my journeys in Tucson i came upon a tall Indian named "Pipestem," i met at an AA meeting, a far throw from my previous partying days and frankly not too exciting. "Pipestem," would become my helper.

I used to like to listen to Pipestem’s stories about how life was recounted to him by his relatives, his aunt and grandmother and about how they spoke to him as a man who would discover his meaning to life. I saw things that way too and I had an affinity to the American Indian culture and a sense that life was more than meets the eye. All experiences had meaning, even the weather, the animals that would cross your path and the singing of the birds and the sounds of the desert hidden in the bushes.

It was a perfect place for me to come alive, but did I think I would find the path of Saint Germain, no way! Maybe some sweat lodges and more desert inspired visions of mystical life, but cosmic significance, I didn’t think so

This time period was around early to mid 1993 and by summer late June, July '93 i would make my first formal contact with learning about Saint Germain. It was through a mystical organization I learned about on a cable TV show while I was visiting in L.A.

I found out all the time they had a small group right here in Tucson, but I had to find the path first, I had to open my eyes and it all began by asking what was truth? What was the reason for my wanderings, my times alone, the periods of being apart from an ordinary sense of consciousness about the world and my place in it?

I will admit what I found out had some surprises but when I finally experienced things that were going to happen to me in my near future it made more sense of all the odd, seemingly displaced and isolated experiences I was having and that had happened in the near past. I would learn there is an order to them, there was continuity to them, an almost invisible guidance and energy that was directing me, but I still did not have a lot of the picture I would come to know. This would also make it easier to help others who might be experiencing a similar quickening, a similar shift.

Looking back on it i was clearly being prepared for that way by all the purifications i was going through.

So I'm riding on this bus in Tucson in current times, November 2006 and I’m having all these flashbacks, but there